Confessions of a Hannah Morris

So I decided to write something humorous. I mean, we all need some laughs right? At times, we need to stop trying to figure out life, digging deeper into ourselves, and reflecting on what could have been. A good laugh can do miracles. So here's to laughing, or at least, I hope this makes you smile.

This is a confession of a Hannah Morris.

1. I dance while brushing my teeth. There was one time, I enjoyed it so much, that I carried it on as I washed my face too.

2. I love wolves. Like I seriously do. It's a bit of an obsession.

3. I didn't play "house" as a kid. I played "wolf pack". It was awesome.

4. I sometimes sit on a chair upside down to get a new perspective on life.

5. I love ice cream SO MUCH!!

6. Cookies too.

7. I just love food in general. But I have a big sweet tooth.

8. I'm always late, but I'm TOTALLY worth the wait.

9. I had a license plate that said the above statement. I miss it.

10. I have a leopard print rug in my apartment. I wish I had a leopard to go with it.

11. When I told my brother about Black Friday, he asked me if it was only for black people.

12. I talk to myself a lot.

13. To above statement: Yes, you definitely do.

14. I make really weird noises. I'm pretty sure I have a noise for every occasion.

15. I know how to ride a motorcycle.

16. So does my Mom.

17. My father is bald.

18. When I laugh too hard, I pee my pants. And I'm not just talking about when I was 5 years old. I'm talking about how I STILL do this, as a 21 year old.

19. My socks usually DO match.

20. I've gotten through airport security without ID.

21. I once had a pizza delivered to me for free. I didn't even order the pizza.

22. I also got a wrap for free. I raced a big black man and won. But I gave him half of it.

23. Yeah... I still pick my boogers... sometimes. OK OK. All the time.

24. I call a man's penis his pee pee. Why? Because it makes people giggle.

25. I'm totally mature..... maybe.

26. I call Jesus "JC" many times. I also like to call God "The Big Guy".

27. God sometimes calls me "H-Dawg".

28. I sing in the car a lot. I sound so good when I blast the music all the way up too.

29. My dog Hank has humping issues.

30. My other dog, Annie, is old and senile and just sits in front of the window, wining at it.

31. I drink lots of water in restaurants. My father calls me a camel and always asks the waiter to bring a pitcher just for me.

32. I definitely fart.

33. Poop too.

34. I air-sing. Ya know.... sing, with no sound coming out, acting all cool and singer-like.

35. I wish I could run around on all fours. In fact, I sometimes do.

36. I'm tired. So I'm going to end this.

37. Good night.